Finding the perfect PHriendship balance

This past weekend was spent with my best friend. We had no husbands to distract us, no job obligations for me, and none of her 3 small children clamoring for her attention. It was awesome, to say the least.

Over lunch, we were discussing the current people in our lives. We are both at the point where we've decided that it is becoming even more important to have quality over quantity when it comes to friends. Being a grown up is hard sometimes, and for that reason alone (never mind all the other reasons we need friends) it is important to only have people around you that nurture you, add to your happiness and elevate you.

We both found it interesting that most friendships seem to have a hierarchy built into them. Whether between 2 friends, or a group of friends.

I thought it was just me, but she admitted to feeling the same way about some of her friends too.

I used the word hierarchy to describe how some friendships feel. With some people it's almost as if you aren't entirely equal. Even though I have a strong personality, am very decisive, and very sure of who I am, I sometimes I feel as though I am the underdog/follower in a friendship. Other times I feel like I am the leader. Often, on my way to meet up with certain friends, I feel like my 36 year old self and then when I get in their presence, I feel like a 6 year old who is trying to stay under the radar and not say anything to set myself apart. Other times, I feel as though the friend I am with feels like the 6 year old - not prepared to really voice the opinion I know they have or be who they really are in front of me. I don't think these positions are agreed to intentionally....no one strong arms the other into taking a lesser position in the friendship, or elevates themselves purposefully. It just seems to be a silent agreement that takes place early in the friendship and continues throughout. It's not a bad thing, either, just very interesting to me. I do feel happier in friendships that have a nice neutral balance to them, however.

It's really rare to find someone who can have a balanced hierarchy or PH balance with.

My best friend and I have that PH(riendship) balance. When we come together we are completely equal. Free to be ourselves, without fear of judgement or rejection. Sometimes, one friend will take the lead and the other will follow, and vise versa, (as we all have strengths that we share at different times-this mostly happens when helping the other person out) but it's not a permanent situation. They both seem to always come back to balance.

I'm lucky to have that true balance with at least one other friend. Being with these people is like eating organic food that hasn't been altered, or like drinking the perfect glass of water. It doesn't need anything added to change the PH balance....it's perfect just the way it is.

And you're healthier and happier for it.

30 Days of Gratitude - A bucket full! (24th-28th)

Just so you know, I am not intentionally avoiding posting every day. I've been away for 3 days in beautiful San Francisco. I have, however, been thankful and aware of things to be grateful for so many things this month, and in the last 5 days, especially.

Walking non-stop, in San Fran, made me grateful for my health - some people do not have the luxury of choosing to walk, instead of taking a cab. Walking also called me to be "present". Aside from having to be aware and not get hit by a car, or pay attention to a map so as not to get lost, it also called me to look at my surroundings and take them in. One of the nice things about when I go on holidays is that "unplugging" from email, my voicemail, my pager and social media, actually heightens my senses. Things look beautiful, food tastes amazing, music sounds clearer. It's really a wonderful way to feel alive again. So, I guess one of my main gratitudes is the ability to HOLIDAY.

Coming home to a clean desk and no smoldering fires to put out is also something I am grateful for. Arriving home at 1:30 am and having to be pulled-together to meet a new client first thing on a Monday is so much easier when there is no chaos to clean up after a holiday. I am grateful to my HUSBAND/business partner who made my little mini-break possible.

One of my friends, even knowing that I was away, made sure to text me while I was away to let me know they were thinking of me. I remember smiling while walking through arrivals in Vancouver, while reading their text. In friendship, as in all relationships, it truly is the LITTLE THINGS.

Above all, I am most grateful for having the time to spend with my BEST FRIEND. With the difference in our lifestyles and our different geographical locations, spending uninterrupted time with my best friend is rare and cherished. Being able to go away with her and shop, eat, laugh, talk, cry and reconnect is one of the highlights of my year so far. She is one of the best human beings I know. I'm very privileged to have her in my life.

Gratitude.....

30 Days of Gratitude - Days 21-23

I have a potpourri of gratitudes this week;

CAT NAPS - The other day I lay down for 20 minutes. My male cat, Adonis came and joined me. He has this thing about laying beside me and snuggling in. I wrap my arm around him and he relaxes his head and falls asleep on my arm. The trouble with this is that when I'm ready to get up, he most certainly is not. So, the other day, he "forced" me to nap for 80 minutes instead. I needed that.

It's always comforting to fall asleep to a purring cat.

A related gratitude is VEGGING OUT - Lately, work has been testing me. I come home burnt out and feeling aggravated. The thought of scanning and uploading another document, or answering another "small" request implodes my brain. So, this week, I have been giving myself permission to just chill out in the evenings. I feel much better for it. It doesn't hurt that I have discovered a TV show that I love ( Flipping Out) thus making it very easy to have a mindless TV marathon and giving my brain a break.

One more thing;

I am very grateful for my friend, RICHARD. He is one of my friends from Vancouver. Although he is 15 years younger than me, I feel that in many ways, he is much older than that. I am always in awe with his ambition and determination. We have differing opinions about which hockey team is better ( Flames or Canucks ) but we don't let that rivalry get between us.

Richard has taken the initiative to organize a project called "Five Hole for Food", an effort to raise money, collect food and raise awareness for food banks across Canada. He is taking one of his favorite things; hockey, and employing that passion to make a difference. He stayed at our house on his way to Toronto ( via car ) and will be making his way back across Canada, stopping in major cities to host a street hockey game and food collection event.

I think that even though I am a lot older than Richard, I am learning more from him than he is learning from me.

That excites me.

You can see what Richard is doing at Five Hole For Food


Gratitude.....

30 Days of Gratitude - Days 17-20

Seeing that's it's Father's Day, I think it was only appropriate that the idea for my gratefulness post came to me this morning on my way to my brother's for breakfast with my family.

This weekend, I am grateful for my MAngels.

I am not at all religious, but I do believe that humans have the ability to help each other out without being physically present with the person they are assisting.

Because this is a multi-day post, I will be grateful for the different types of MAngels in my life ;

My friendly, neighborhood MAngelmen;

If you have been in my life lately, you'll know if you fall into this category. You are a dear male friend who has made his presence known this week. Be it through text message, email, facebook message, a phone call, a series of comical emails, or time spent together. You are slowly restoring my faith in the male spirit to just be a listener, a confidante, a friend. You recognize that you don't need to "fix" it or me, you just need to be with me in it.

And sometimes, you don't even know you're helping me.

If you have done any of the above lately, I thank you with the biggest of hearts.

Daddy Mangels;

I have many male friends who are separated or divorced. Every single one of them have taken the enthusiastic initiave to be an excellent parent to their children. In some cases, they are the sole/majority custodian of their children. I am so, so happy that I can call these parents/role models/instillers of confidence and love, my friends. Being a child of divorced parents, and having such a Daddy MAngel as these friends are, I know how important it is to have the male influence in a child's life. It is instrumental to the self-esteem and confidence of a child.

I appreciate every one of my single dad friends, who are giving dads, worldwide, a wonderful name.

My Dad

My dad is an angel. He is the measuring stick, not only for men in my life, but for everyone that I welcome into my life. Together, with my mom, he has created a safe, loving environment to be myself. He has guided me, advised me, accepted me and loved me unconditionally through my entire life.

Not many people know this about my dad. He does spiritual healing. It's a gift he's had for decades and it is something that he is so skilled at, and he executes it with the kindest and most sincere of approaches. Although it is not his occupation, I believe it is his calling.

I often get the feeling that my dad doesn't feel he has been the best father in the world. I'm glad I have the rest of my life to prove it to him.

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Days 14, 15, 16

Wow, I sort of fell off the wagon with my blog posts there, folks. I was/am exhausted so felt that I should rest rather than do anything else I felt obligated to do.

I was actually starting to feel like this blog wasn't having an impact but I got some unsolicited feedback from 2 friends and I realize that even though people don't make comments on the blog, doesn't mean they aren't reading and appreciating it. So, thank you. I am grateful for those of you who are reading and appreciating what I am trying to do here.

Looks like I have some catching up to do!! So, here we go...

Over the past 3 days, I, admittedly, haven't been feeling very grateful. Not that I've been ungrateful, I've just felt kind of meh. BUT, there is always something to be grateful for.

I think what the last 3 days has taught me is that people DO care about me. I think I'm difficult to "love" ,sometimes, in that I have a very independent nature and don't ask for support or help very often. So, I am really grateful for those of you in my life that reach out when you know something isn't quite right with me. THANK YOU.

I am also really grateful for MUSIC. We have all experienced that moment when the most appropriate song finds us, whether we are going through a loss or challenge, or deeply in love, or excited, or sad. I spend so much time in my car, mostly alone, and this week the most appropriate songs reached through my stereo and found me. The 3 songs that made the biggest impact on me, or reminded me of my values and who I am are;

"Seek Up" - Dave Matthews Band "....you seek up an emotion and our cup is overflowing...." (more)
"Step Inside this House" - Lyle Lovett "....It's funny how I loved that book, and I never loved that girl...." (more)
"I've Been This Way Before" - Neil Diamond. "....some people never see the light until the day they die..." (more)

They all resonate for different reasons. All 3 have been on repeat this week. I encourage you to read the lyrics or listen to them. They are all beautiful songs; each with a great message.

One day I'd like to sit down and start to compile the "Soundtrack to my life". It would be a huge project. Maybe it should be on my bucket list....


I am also grateful for CHILDREN, specifically their authenticity. I am so fortunate to volunteer at a school with an emphasis on the development of special needs children. (There are also typical children in attendance at this wonderful school) As the school year draws to a close, the children are enjoying special "theme" days. Today was sports day, but because it was so miserable outside, we all needed to be flexible. All of the kindergarten classes were transformed into "stations" and the children were able to move freely around the rooms and explore the different opportunities. I was in the music room. We had bongo drums, bells, triangles, rubbing sticks....the whole nine yards really. It was wonderful to watch them "dance like no one is watching". Total authenticity. We ( the adults) couldn't help but follow their lead. At one point, a sweet little boy had a plastic hammer and was beating it against the bongo drums. He accidentally hit me in the chin with the hammer. He looked at me and said "I'm sorry" and then took the palm of his hand and caressed my whole face until he knew that I was okay. It was the sweetest thing I'd seen in a long time. You cannot teach that kind of authentic compassion. But you can unteach it. Let's agree not to do that to our children.

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 13

Today I am grateful for CHEAP AIRFARE.

My friend Jess is moving back to Vancouver to continue her residency there. She is a friend that I met while representing her when she relocated to Calgary. She is yet another friend made through work, that I am sending off to Vancouver.

My best friend lived in Calgary when I met her through her husband. He and I met through work. They moved back to Vancouver about 5 years ago.

I met my friend Gwen in Calgary, and helped her with her relocation to Vancouver. Our friendship was too short here in Calgary, but we've maintained and strenghtened our relationship even though she lives in Vancouver.

The most important person in my life; my Mom, has plans to move to Vancouver permanently within the next 2 years.

I think the universe is telling me something ;

Either;

People move to Vancouver to get away from me

OR

I need to spend more time there. :)

I have several friends I care about in the Vancouver area. I'm thrilled to know that I am only a few hundred dollars and and hour flight away. I can really see them any time I want.

Cheap airfare works for other cities too! Last fall I visited friends in Chicago, New York and Raliegh, NC for $900 Canadian ( 3 out of 4 of those flights were direct too!)

Yay for CHEAP AIRFARE!

Gratitude...

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 12

Wow! I'm exhausted....so tired that I am sure I shouldn't have been driving yesterday. It's from work, yes, but also from filling my days with "yes, yes, yes" instead of "nos".

This weekend, I am grateful for the word NO.
In it's entirety.
"No" is a complete sentence.

I'm pretty much over trying to please everyone, because I have found that is impossible. So, sometimes I need to say "No" or "No, thank you" to someone or something, in order to say "Yes" to myself.

I'm becoming increasingly comfortable with the notion that No is not necessarily a negative. It's actually liberating to say, and to practice.

So long as I am "for something" ( like resting, exercising, nurturing my soul, hanging out by myself ) and not "against something" else ( like, just saying "no" to be difficult ) I am fine with NO.

Saying No once in awhile, allows me to say "Yes" with enthusiasm, more often.

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 11

Today I am grateful for a gift my mom gave me when I was small :

OPTIMISM.

I think there is a clear difference between optimism and naivety/ignorance/denial.

Part of naivety is to believe that a situation doesn't have an impact.
Part of ignorance about your situation is to be unaware that there is a solution.
Part of denial is to ignore the problem and/or the solution.

I believe that to be optimistic does not make you an idiot to know in your heart that everything will work out for the best. To be optimistic is to choose the positive side of a situation. To be optimistic is to choose happiness in your life, regardless of your present circumstances.

My mom and I "argue" about who came up with our shared mantra "Every problem has a solution". She thinks that I came up with it; I believe she instilled it in me and I just "shared" it back in my adult life.

When you seriously look at a situation, no matter how dire it appears, there is always a solution. All Ways. You just have to be prepared to LOOK at the situation. And you know what? Not every solution is favorable, or feels good. But solutions exist. They allow you to make a decision and move on. That in itself is a positive.

I know in my heart of hearts, that no matter what is thrown is my way, OR what I attract ( which really is the key to learning what I'm supposed to learn in that moment);

There IS a SOLUTION.
I CAN HANDLE IT.
And I WILL BE OKAY.
In fact, I WILL BE BETTER THAN OKAY.

This is the gift my mom gave me in the womb. It's a FACT.

You can not convince me otherwise.

Thank you, Mom


Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 10

Well, it's actually the 11th day, but since I'm still awake at 1:30, I think this still qualifies as Day 10.

I'm so wiped out so I will make this short.....

I feel like I'm burning the candle at both ends these days; trying to fit everything and every ONE into my schedule.

So, today I am grateful that I HAVE two ends of the candle to burn. I have my health, my wit and my sense of humor. I'm very fortunate that I CAN burn the candle at both ends.

I can also see the light at the end of the tunnel....things will slow down, and then I will be grateful for the break.

It's always the way it should be.

Gratitude...

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 9

I had a fantastic day. Early in the day, I had a discussion about my "trust meter" with a friend of mine. I want to get back to my gratitude for trust at a later date, because later I was inspired to write about HONESTY.

I watched the Oprah interview with Sarah Ferguson this evening and was touched at just how honest Sarah appeared. She seemed truthful and vulnerable, and sincere.

It reminded me that I really do appreciate honesty in my relationships. Trust me, it's sometimes difficult to find. I know we all tell little white lies to protect others, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the "get real" honesty that is shared by people that have a strong "trust meter".

I think it's important not to lie when the truth will do, which is most often. I think it's important to offer truthful opinions when asked by someone you care about. I think it's important to tell people how you feel, even if it risks them being unhappy, or makes you appear the fool.

Sometimes people tell you that they want to hear the truth, but they actually don't. Knowing how to approach these situations is an art. It takes practice. With those people, I tend to have "silent agreements" about how we continue on with our friendship. Both people know, on a very unconscious level, that small lies ( even those by omission) are being told between them. This isn't wrong, it happens. But more and more, I am welcoming people into my life that are "full disclosure" type of people. If I am uncomfortable with their honesty or their truth, it says more about me than it does about them.

I'm grateful for the few people in which I have a completely honest relationship with. You know who you are.

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 8

Today, and every day, I am grateful for my FRIENDS.

I was given a heart token today that read "Friends are the family we make for ourselves". I found that so appropriate, especially as lately I have really been evaluating my relationships and trying to strengthen the friendships that are deep and meaningful to me.

One day I was having a rough "family" day and made a joke : "Family is the reason we make friends". I really didn't mean it, because my family is tremendous. I know you may be thinking "Yeah right, no one's family is perfect or wonderful all the time", but my family really is. My parents have set an example about how to treat each other ( they've been divorced for 30+ years) that I haven't seen demonstrated very often. My brother is amazing and the rest of my extended family adds so much substance to my life.

But, my FRIENDS.....my friends are amazing. I am so grateful to have such beautiful, straightforward, caring friends. They also are incredibly patient with me when I "disappear" or aren't 100 % present in their lives. I always feel supported, never alone. In fact, the only time I feel lonely is when I take myself "out". They always reach out, even if I am not always available to receive their love.

So, to my friends. Thank you. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for being in my extended "family"

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 7

I laughed a lot today. And ended my evening with a phone call full of laughter.

I'm so grateful to have people in my life that bring me joy. There is nothing better than a good, deep, belly laugh.

I laughed a lot on the weekend, too. Laughed until I cried. Had some sad tears as well, but the laughter is what I remember the most.

I'm so grateful to have people in my life that I feel safe enough to cry around. They are usually the ones that also make me laugh with the most feeling and sincerity.

I know I will laugh tomorrow too, because life is too short to go around being worried and stoic.

I'm so grateful that I can go to bed tonight, full of love and joy, and wake up happy tomorrow.


Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 6

...."please ensure your own oxygen mask is securely fastened before you attempt to assist others with their masks"....

We all know the flight attendant speech that is made before each flight we take off on. The reason they want us to put our own oxygen mask on before helping someone else is so that we CAN help the other person. Without our own mask, we may not get the oxygen we need to ensure that we are capable of helping others.

Today, I am grateful for OXYGEN MASKS. Not the ones that fall from the ceiling of an airplane in the event of an accident, but the people who in my life that support me. I picked up the analogy from the facilitator of the workshop I attended this weekend. She made such a good point about having people around you that speak your language and can breathe life back into you, when you feel as though you can't breathe or carry on.

In life, much like on a plane, oxygen masks are rare. There are enough for everyone, but they aren't necessarily in abundance.

There are a few people who speak my language, who know the cues to watch for when I am "out of breath", who are my lifeline. They are available, literally and figuratively, when I need them. They can sense the turbulence and "drop from the ceiling" so that I can take a breath and survive another day.

I am so grateful for my Mom, Dad, and cherished Friends....

My Oxygen Masks.

THANK YOU


Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Days 4 and 5

I had some anxiety on Friday when I found out the hotel room I was staying in didn't have wifi. This meant that I couldn't post to my blog while I was away for the weekend. It did, however, allow me to focus on the person I was spending time with, which makes me grateful. More on that a little later in the post. In the meantime, I will fill you in on what I initially intended to post....

Day 4

Today I am grateful for being ALIVE. I am grateful every day, but day 4 was my birthday, which is that annual wake up call that, whether you like it or not, makes you stop for a moment and take stock of your life.

I love getting older. When I was in my 20s, I thought I knew it all. And now, in my 30s, I KNOW that I don't KNOW it all. I'm so excited to see what the future holds, while I do my best to live in each moment.

It really disappoints me when people have a birthday and find it depressing because they don't believe they are where they should be in life. Instead of reflecting on where one "should" have been, I suggest looking at where you are. If you look closely, you will probably recognize that you are EXACTLY where you should be.

Are you happy? Are you ALIVE? More importantly, are you happy and grateful to be alive? I know that I am.

I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for my wonderful parents. So, this would be an appropriate opportunity to express my gratitude of them. I also wouldn't be who I am if it weren't for the "village" of people that have "raised" me; parents, family, friends, teachers, mentors.

Gratitude....

Day 5

Today I am grateful for the UNIVERSE'S INTUITION.



Let me explain....

This weekend I was enrolled in a workshop that arrived at just the right moment in my life, because I was ready for it.

This workshop really required my utmost attention. It required my dedication. It required no distraction.

Well, guess what? Because my intent was clear, which was to be present, the universe created an environment which allowed me to focus on my goal.

Normally, my cell phone rings several times a day for business and I am inundated with texts and emails from clients and colleagues. This weekend, the phone was eerily but gratefully quiet. This enabled me to do what I needed to do.

Gratitude....

Read last year's birthday blog post here...

Retro Birthday Repost - "Growing In"

I recently had a birthday. I have been looking forward to this particular birthday for awhile. I am proud of my age. I am 35 years young this year. This means that I have lived 35 amazing, twisty-turny, happy, heart-achy, liberating, learning years. I am very proud of this accomplishment.

That is the way I see it. It is an accomplishment. Absolutely.

I can guarantee you that I will never be heard saying "I'm not where I thought I would be at *insert age here* " or "I haven't done anything I should have by the time I turned *insert age here*!"

I hear this a lot from people. A lot. It upsets me to hear this coming from anyone. Part of me feels compassion for those people who feel their life has held little worth, while part of me wants to slap that complaint right out of their mouth.

I don't feel I have earned the right to complain about my life. I have not lived a charmed life, whatsoever, but its MY life. And it has been beautiful, even when it wasn't. I wanted to be an artist and a ballerina AND a singer when I grew up. My goals have changed many, many times since I was 5. Would I love to have the ability to put the beauty of my imagination into drawings? Yes. Would I not love to have the talent to move my body beautifully like a trained dancer. Absolutely. Would I not love to stand on stage and sing my heart out to a crowd....well, maybe. BUT, just because none of those things have happened, I will not beat myself up.

With every heartache, disappointment AND accomplishment my strength has grown, and usually I have been presented with great opportunity. More often than not, the end result is always better than I could have imagined. I have learned to embrace challenge and run with it, make it my own.

I remember in my teens thinking I knew everything. Trust me. I know it was just the hormones. In my 20's I thought I was wise and invincible. I was smart, but not wise....and certainly not invincible. Hormones were a big part of my 20's too. One of the most special people in my life summed it up this way; he said "By the time you are 30, you are pretty much who you will be for the rest of your life". I tend to agree, with a caveat; I do believe that most of who you are is in place by the time you are 30....and then you build and (hopefully) grow into your later years with the knowledge of who you are, intact.

I am so excited to get to know myself better as I grow "up". Although I prefer the term growing "in"...which, my interpretation of which is to take what I know of myself and make the person I am smarter, more compassionate to myself and others, stronger, happier and so forth. And by growing "in", my sense of self worth will shine outward and upon other people, hopefully making them better people for knowing me.

Interestingly enough, my life has more or less turned out the way I have envisioned it. Sometimes the pictures in my head are different than how reality presents itself, but one thing has always remained; My life will be beautiful. I will embrace change, beauty, love, risk, and life with every strength I can muster. I will succeed. I will always succeed. This has been, is, and will always be true.

And so it is.

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 3

Part of the problem with leaving these blog posts until the end of the day is that I am so tired now as I sit down to write this.

So, bear with me as I make a short list of things I am grateful for today. I promise to write more tomorrow.

- The fresh scent of the city after a good, hard rain

- A friend wanting to be the first to wish me a happy birthday so he did so a day early, via text, while making me laugh....thus making my day up until then

- Long drives in the country on the (unsuccessful) quest for pie

- My friend, Vijay, saving the day with "virtual" pie

- G 'n R's "Welcome to the Jungle" ( don't ask....maybe just miss the good ole days)

- The ability for my colleagues to bond together during this economic blip to share and admit that it is scary out there for them too.

- My new iPod sound-dock, sent to me from my friend Harry, and "nephew" Mykah

- My gorgeous, fluffy bed, which is currently beckoning me.

- Sleep

Gratitude.....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 2

There will likely be many days where my gratitude post will be about MUSIC, in some way, shape or form. Today is one of those days.

When I have a bad day, I try to reflect back to see what I could have done different in that day to make it happier. I usually have an "a-ha" moment, too late, of course, when I realize I'd gone most of the day without music on. I find that even the most daunting task is so much easier when I have music playing in the background.

Those of you who know me well are aware of my very broad interest in music. My tastes range from Classical to Metal, with almost everything in between. I can find the most appropriate music to fit any occasion, and I do. Much like food, water and sleep, I am not complete without music. I feel I would really die without it.

The other element of music that I am grateful for is the multitude of good friends I have acquired, especially in the last year and a half, because of it. I am sure that at some point I will go into further detail about almost each and every one of them, but I think it is fair to say that music does really unite people. Some people have come into my life because of music, and others have come in and our bond strengthened because of music.

Music is the thread that really does unite me with most of the people I love the most in my life.

Gratitude....

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 1

As I was driving to an appointment with a very loyal client, I decided that my gratitude today is LOYALTY.

As I was driving home from my appointment with my very loyal client, I was fortunate enough to talk to one of my most loyal friends, thus solidifying my gratitude for the day.

Whether it is a loyal pet, client, friend or family member, having someone who has my back, no matter what, is one of the most important elements of the foundation that I stand upon.

I realize that in this economy, and with all the choices of service providers out there, that clients can shop around for a better deal that what I am prepared to offer them. Yet, most of my clients just are that loyal. Feeling safe in a business relationship is a two-way street, and when I know that they trust me and value my opinion and service, I am able to propel myself to do an even better job for them. It's a great feeling.

When it comes to friends, I can count on one hand the friends I have that are truly loyal to me. The friend that I spoke to tonight is the embodiment of loyalty. I never have to worry that she is talking out of both sides of her mouth with me. We can go without talking for over a month and the moment we speak again, not a moment has been lost. We have very different realities....she the mother of 3 young children and a crazy household, me with a career and a somewhat milder existence. Yet, we recognize the each other in one another and therein lies the bond. I've described this friend, and one other, as the girls who would drive my get-away car. I know that they may not always agree with my actions or position, but would never judge me unfairly or talk about me behind my back. I find these types of friendships rare and so cherished.

So, today I am grateful for the loyalty of the people in my life that appreciate and care about me. And I am glad they do....because I appreciate and care for them too.

Gratitude.....

30 Days of Gratitude - Ground Zero

It's the eve of the infamous "Junefest" ( a celebration of birthdays within extremely close proximity to one another, shared by very close friends) and so I decided to finally spill the beans on my next blogging exercise.

In searching for an outlook for my blog, I decided that I would take the month of June to explore

"30 Days of Gratitude".

I used to practice the art of gratitude, each night before bed....writing a few things that I was grateful for in that day, whether the day was good or bad. In doing so, I was able to concentrate on the truly simple and beautiful things in my life, and let go of the bad.

I often complain, usually with my tongue in cheek...but sometimes I find it difficult to see the beauty in every situation. Those of you who know me likely know that I am a mostly positive person and do my best to ensure that others around me are as happy as possible.

One of my friends on Facebook, a large, tattooed lead singer of a rock band, posts his gratitudes every day, and so I thank him for his "vulnerability"and strength in breaking through any negative stereotypes that may have put upon him. His gratitude posts have inspired many to do the same.
(Thank you Troy)

My hope is that just one of my gratitude posts will touch each and every one of you. And I welcome you to post your gratitude of the day underneath mine, as a comment.

Have a wonderful month!